


sometimes it all gets a little too much

by soranpreath



Category: Women's Association Football | Women's Soccer RPF
Genre: Angst, Angst and No Happy Ending, Anxiety, F/F, Oops, Soran - Freeform, USWNT, i hope it ends up okay, i wrote this last verse to first
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-20
Updated: 2021-03-20
Packaged: 2021-03-29 01:13:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,060
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30148464
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/soranpreath/pseuds/soranpreath
Summary: hey all! a soran fic with the song "a little too much" by shawn mendes(i would reccomened listening to while you read)tbh i had this planned out FOREVER but just now got to sitting down and writing itplease let me know what you think :)p.s. washington and orlando trades never happened in this fic universe
Relationships: Lindsey Horan/Emily Sonnett
Kudos: 23





	sometimes it all gets a little too much

_She would not show that she was afraid_

_But being and feeling alone was too much to face_

_Though everyone said that she was so strong_

_What they didn't know is that she could barely carry on_

  
  


Dasani: “Hey you busy? Wanna grab food?”

linds: “sorry sonnett, russell's coming to town for a few days and i promised i would spend some time with him”

  
She sighed after she received the text. She shouldn’t have been surprised. Lindsey and Russell were on and off every two weeks, it seemed now.

And every time that they broke up, Sonnett was always there, acting as a shoulder for Lindsey to cry on.

Emily always put on her “happy” face around _everybody_ in her life. That was, everybody except for Kelley.

  
When she was training, whether it be at national team camp or simply for the Thorns, she was always making jokes. She knew when to be serious and put the work in, but always put a smile on everyone’s face.

When anyone came to her for advice or help, she was more than willing to help out. She got in a nasty habit of always putting people before herself. Often people’s wants over her own needs.

But, when she was at national team camp, or when they played Utah, she broke down to Kelley. Kelley was the only one who knew just how much Lindsey’s mixed up love life was completely _destroying_ Emily.

Kelley was the only one who knew the scars-both physical and psychological-Lindsey had caused her (unknowingly). She was always there for Sonnett, any time or place. 

Kelley was one of the only people who was able to calm down Sonnett after a panic attack, or talk her down from her runs of overthinking.

Yet, Lindsey didn’t know any of this, of course. Emily was very careful as to who was able to see her at her lowest, and that number was a very small one.

  
  


_But she knew that she would be okay_

_So she didn't let it get in her way_

  
  


So, she took all of her pent up emotions, and turned towards soccer. She crushed Thorns preseason, in the best shape of her professional career, maybe even her life. She was crucial to their starting line up, they only lost two games, and both times she was away at camp for the national team.

And, for the national team, she was a superstar. With Kelley’s ankle being so fragile, she needed to be rested, and Sonnett became a starter. She perfected her clean slide tackles, and began to create play more often up the wing, leading to some great goals.

Somehow, Lindsey’s on and off love life’s strain on Sonnett didn’t affect her playing.

  
  


_Sometimes it all gets a little too much_

_But you gotta realize that soon the fog will clear up_

_And you don't have to be afraid, because we're all the same_

_And we know that sometimes it all gets a little too much_

  
  


She was having a particularly rough day at training, her frustration getting the best of her. She made some unfair tackles, so Mark sent her to the locker room to cool down for a second.

So, she was surprised when she heard the distinct sound of Tobin’s whistling, as she walked into the locker room.

She saw the sympathy in Tobin’s eyes as she sat down next to Emily. She just wrapped her in a warm hug, not worrying about anything else, but making Sonnett feel better

  
  


_She would always tell herself she could do this_

_She would use no help it would be just fine_

_But when it got hard she would lose her focus_

_So take my hand and we'll be alright_

  
  


Of course she had to go and post that picture. Looking so lovingly into his eyes, displayed for the whole internet to see. It tore Sonnett apart. She knew that she could be there, instead, with Lindsey looking so deeply into her eyes, but no, she had to be here, in Atlanta, all alone.

Once Kelley saw the instagram post, she knew that Sonnett would need her. So, she grabbed her keys, turned off the soccer game in the background and headed over to Sonnett’s offseason apartment.

She had a key, one given years ago, which she used to open, not wanting to go through the awkwardness of Sonnett assuring Kelley she was fine, even though they both knew she wasn’t.

Kelley walked in and saw a pair of puffy red eyes staring back at her.

She enveloped the poor shaking girl in a hug, and her heart broke when Sonnett whispered, “Why can’t it be me? Just once, why can’t she choose me?”

  
  


_And she knew that she would be okay_

_So she didn't let it get in her way_

_Sometimes it all gets a little too much_

_But you gotta realize that soon the fog will clear up_

_And you don't have to be afraid, because we're all the same_

_And we know that sometimes it all gets a little too much_

  
  


“Sonnett what is going on with you? You’ve been avoiding me all camp” Lindsey asked frustrated, after they got back into the lobby.   
  


“I’m not, I promise. I’m just tired” Sonnett replied.

“Did I do something? Please tell me, I’ll fix it I promise” Lindsey pleaded softly.

Sonnett just shook her head gently, and began to walk away back to her room.

Lindsey didn’t let her get that far, grabbing her wrist, looking at her with pleading eyes.

Emily shrugged away, figuring she needed to get some air before she talked to Lindsey again.  
  


She just walked in the opposite direction, finding herself outside in the pouring rain sitting on a random bench. 

She felt a hand on her shoulder and jumped a little bit, turning around to see a soaked Lindsey, her hair falling into her face.

“Why won’t you talk to me Em, what happened? We used to be so close?” Lindsey asked, trying again to understand why Sonnett was shutting her out. 

“Please, Lindsey, not right now” She replied, starting to get frustrated and flustered.

“Why Son? Please just tell me why”

“BECAUSE I LOVE YOU YOU IDIOT” Sonnett shouted in the rain, finally breaking down after holding those words in for so long.

And then she walked away.

**Author's Note:**

> you can find me on tumblr!!  
> come chat or send requests or just hang out!!  
> as always, your comments and support make my day every time


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